After earning a bachelor’s degree in public relations in Michigan from a highly accredited university, if there is one thing that I learned, it is the concept of always being honest in the messages we share for our clients and ourselves. It is much easier to address a conflict when it arises (as they will) if we are consistently honest.
If we are not honest in the messages we share, a conflict could turn out to be a giant, out-of-control monster that ultimately destroys a company, service, or, for that matter, a country. In this case, it is extremely difficult to come back from a misinformation disaster, clean up the mess, and recreate trust.
For example, I remember when Volkswagen was exposed for not being honest about their safety ratings – the company tanked in sales, and most importantly, they lost the trust they once had with their audience and the market as a whole. It has taken them years to come back from this.
According to reports by The Telegraph (a well-known news outlet in the UK), “Volkswagen customers are being misled over the safety ratings of certain vehicles, it has been revealed. An investigation by Channel 4’s Dispatches found that some dealers are claiming that the current VW Polo has a five star score for safety, when the rating has in fact expired.
An undercover reporter was falsely told by one salesman that the model had been tested in 2014, meaning that Polos from 2015 and 2016 “absolutely” had the highest ENCAP (European New Car Assessment Programme) safety score available.
Dispatches also called into question the reliability of the ENCAP ratings widely used in the UK after it emerged that the test crashes do not always accurately reflect the damage caused in real life accidents. American safety engineers discovered that a test involving an impact to 25 per cent of the front of the vehicle found nearly three-quarters of cars crumpled, putting the driver at risk of death,”.
Another reason to be honest, suggested by Forbes, states, “A new era of internal communication may be emerging. While showing emotion and honesty in the workplace was once seen as a weakness, I believe incorporating genuine emotion into a team’s internal communications could very well be a leader’s secret weapon.
Being open and transparent at work might seem daunting at first, but I’ve found that it’s integral to building strong relationships and synergy on a team,”.
On a personal level, honesty builds trust, strengthens relationships, fosters closeness, and open communication, which withstands life’s trials and tribulations. You could say the same for professional relationships.
How can open and honest communication be promoted
In our relationships, when we speak from the heart with honesty and integrity, we speak the language of the heart. The other person’s innermost self connects with our innermost self, and this is where the magic happens. At this juncture, it is where long-standing, intimate relationships not only survive life’s challenges but thrive under all conditions.
By the way, intimacy in a relationship does not only apply to sexual relations. In fact, the complete definition of intimacy, from the American Psychological Association, is defined as, “An interpersonal state of extreme emotional closeness such that each party’s personal space can be entered by any of the other parties without causing discomfort to that person. Intimacy characterizes close, familiar, and usually affectionate or loving personal relationships and requires the parties to have a detailed knowledge or deep understanding of each other,”.
My mom always said that trust must be earned, that even though someone might have love for another, it does not mean that trust is automatically given. People must create safe spaces for others so that they may feel comfortable in sharing their true selves. Furthermore, in an intimate relationship, we must engage in active listening, communicate honestly, and most importantly, respond promptly to amend our behavior when we have wronged one another.
In a spiritual sense, I like to refer to what I have learned in certain circles. I have been taught to continue to take personal inventory and when I am wrong, promptly admit it. Prior to this principle of life, I made a searching and fearless inventory of myself, withholding nothing and looking for my part in all instances.
Then, I admitted these things that I found unacceptable, as well as the exact nature of my wrongs, to myself, my Higher Power/Creator/The Universe/God, and to another person who also lives by these principles and has gone through this process themselves. It works – it really does.
In this spiritual circle that I am most grateful to be a part of, we have a 575+ page, big book that expresses the vital importance of this principle of an honest personal inventory, on page 75 that reads, “We pocket our pride and go to it, illuminating every twist of character, every dark cranny of the past. Once we have taken this step, withholding nothing, we are delighted. We can look the world in the eye. We can be alone at perfect peace and ease. Our fears fall from us. We begin to feel the nearness of our Creator. We may have had certain spiritual beliefs, but now we begin to have a spiritual experience…We feel we are on the Broad Highway walking hand in hand with the Spirit of the Universe,”.
Why is honesty important in parenting?
Honesty in parenting creates honest kids who become adults with integrity. As a mom of two sons, since they were little, I have always expressed that they could come to me with any problem, and that if they had done wrong, as long as they were open and honest about it, they would not get grounded. However, if I found out something they did wrong and they lied, the consequences would be doubled.
Additionally, I maintained honesty in our relationships, despite the fact that I was the parent. I explained that “even though I’m your mom,” it does not mean that I am always right. Notably, I am willing to admit when I am wrong. So far, I have honored my word to them by being honest. *Spoiler Alert for Children! Well…except the whole Santa Claus tradition. *
Some of the ways I reinforced this style of open communication were in the following actions:
- Explained and defined expectations and rules for their safety
- Defined how open communication works
- Set boundaries, and I’m transparent
- Created a safe and supportive home
- Built trust so they feel comfortable in sharing their thoughts and feelings without fear of being judged or punished
- Encouraged vulnerability in leading by example by being authentic, open, and honest about my experiences and challenges, showing them that it’s okay to be vulnerable and make mistakes
- Created safe spaces, like going to a different room and shutting the door so no one else in the house hears what they have to say. Also, I never share what one child tells me with another-I respect their privacy
- Actively listen – I don’t continue cooking dinner if they are trying to express themselves, even as toddlers
- I pay attention to verbal and nonverbal communication – I ask for clarification, and repeat back to them to ensure I heard them correctly
- I address any problems immediately and make amends when warranted
Why are honest messages important
In conclusion, honest messages foster trust, enhance relationships, and drive success whether in the workplace, in our personal lives, or on a world stage – because it matters.